I Wish I Knew This When…

Growing up, I was part of a very conservative Catholic family. As a matter of fact, my grandparents lived right across the street from a Greek Orthodox family. A family not unlike the Greek Orthodox family we see in the movies.

I grew up believing that whatever happened, I was wrong. Even if I was right, I was wrong for being right. And guess what, I was wrong. I thought that’s the way life worked and as I ventured out on my own I started working with these thoughts in mind.

I learned that to get the best work out of people, you really wanted them to be correct and have the feeling that those above them had their back because they knew they were right. They needed to be praised in public and corrected in private. They need to know that their supervisor is there to guide them and have their back, and encourage them on.

Learning this knowledge actually helped me in the long run. When the factory I worked at had four open supervisor positions, they interviewed 81 different people. I was one of the last.

When asked about supervision techniques, I explained it as a supervisor. I was the cheerleader. It was my job to get everything the people needed to get their jobs done correctly. Parts, guidance, and correct work processes must be present and ready for the job. That’s what I was really supervising, The success of my team.

Isn’t that something a team member would like to know upfront?

Ask

Thank you for spending some time with me today.

It never hurts to ask. And if you are hurting it is the perfect time to ask. So many things that get tied up in bureaucratic red tape and waiting to go through the endless line of paperwork or sitting in an in-basket somewhere waiting for overworked people to find the time to approve or decline and pass on can be handled swiftly and efficiently by merely asking the question.

Actually, those handling the paperwork appreciate a kind question being asked. The decision makers get to connect with the end-user of whatever the request is. They also can see their actions and motion actually helping a fellow human being. Asking the question makes everyone feel involved on a human scale.

If you asked the question, whether the answer is exactly what you wanted, or not, at least you know the question was considered and weighed, and a valid action was given. And you know, that at least your voice was heard in the making of that decision. It is better to stand up and ask than it is to just let the system run, and then gripe about the decisions for a long time to come.

Is there anything you would like to ask me?

Take Time

How are you doing?  Are you taking time for yourself?

We do so much for so many others, and often we forget to take time for ourselves. Sometimes, we demand so much from ourselves that when we cannot meet a goal or a deadline, we get upset…  with ourselves.

For being out there trying our best, I think we ought to give ourselves a break. After all, the bad news is, Hollywood already cast Superman and Wonder Woman, and we did not make the cut. We tend to give everyone else a break, and often we are much harder on ourselves.

Cutting ourselves some slack is not the same as backing off or giving up. It is the ability to take a step back, rest the body, clear the mind and rejuvenate the soul. If you can take 20 minutes a couple of times a day and possibly an hour or two a weekend, you will be amazed at what it does for you. Productivity you gain from that small time spent will more than make up the time you take to reset yourself.

What can you do in 20 minutes? You can take a walk outdoors and breathe some fresh air. You can walk up and down the hallway and do some stretches. You can sit in a quiet place and meditate. You can go watch a sunrise or a sunset. You could take a quick shower which would rejuvenate the mind and body. There are many things you could do, to take a step back from others, and the electronic world, and recharge a battery, your battery.

You get the idea. The thing to remember is, do not feel guilty to take care of yourself. After all, the good we do for others is important. Although, we should not destroy ourselves doing it.

More Control within

We hold more control than we ever know.

We’re pushed on by forces beyond our control every day. We do not have to bend to those forces. And most times, it is better if we do not. The forces at play are concerned about themselves, what their needs and desires are, and how they achieve through the skillful use of others.

We have to do this because of the money. We should really be doing that because of politics. We should be doing the other because of the neighbors… It seems as though demands are never-ending and resources are often meager at best.

With all of the above going on in our lives, I would just like to offer a thought. What if we didn’t? What if we gave up on letting others tell us to do this, that, and the other?

I’m not saying not to do anything. I’m talking about finding new voices to guide you. We always follow voices different than us, mainly because they’re different than us. We assume their difference makes them better. I believe I have found something even better than them.

I’m not saying to forget conventional wisdom. I am saying to look inside find that quiet voice within you. Not the one screaming in your head saying you’re doing everything wrong, rather the quiet voice, and consider it.

Do good for yourself and your family, and others. Strive to better yourself. And, help others to find that good within themselves. The real treasures in life aren’t things, the real treasures are the times we share with each other.

Take A Look

We all have work we want to do in life, and we all have work we have to do in life.

If we are lucky, we like the work we do. Yet, some of the work is important whether we like it or not? When we get to this point, we need to stop and think for a moment.

Am I about to tell you that you don’t have to do work that you don’t like? Sorry, no. Some work we do not enjoy is still very important work. Instead, when faced with a task you don’t really want to do, stop and consider for a second.

Stop and consider why the task needs to be done. Consider what will happen if the task is not done. I hate to mow the lawn and trim the trees. So, I have some things to consider. Consider what the yard could look like if I did not do anything. Overgrown, bushes turning into trees, and havoc sprouting up everywhere. It would be a real unsightly mess. I may get some comments, but I sure wouldn’t like them.

Next, consider what the yard would look like if you did a half-hearted job. Wayward bushes and trees may be knocked down, most of the grass would be cut, you might even pile the trash into a central location. Yet the place would only look so-so. Would this really make you happy? Will it make you feel good? Or would it just be one more task done until you have to do it again?

Then, think of what the yard would look like if you really set out to do a good job. Trash bagged and ready for removal, the grass neatly trimmed with care and edges clean and straight, sidewalks swept, and proper maintenance of the lawn. Wow, this may take half the day or more. Just think of how you’ll feel about a good-looking yard when the work is done. Consider how future effort will be easier as long as the yard is kept up and maintenance may end up as little as a couple of hours a week, and that time may be spread over many days.

All of us are individuals, and as such, we all have things we do not like to do. We just need to look through the work, to see if we like the outcome.

Inspire Someone

Thanks, we are glad to have you here with us again!

Have you been thinking about what we’ve been talking about this week? Have you been writing things down? This is your life. I think we each only get one, and it is important that you have the chance to live the life that does you honor.

I have been taking a course on various companies. Learning what motivated them. Learning about their passions. Learning what it took to become viable and sustainable. For the founders of these companies, it truly is work. It is the work of fulfilling their passion.

Two kids from the same high school, one in ends up flipping burgers and salting fries. The other is driving Mercedes and taking vacations to Hawaii. Why?

Think of life as trade offs. 

Even better, think of where your passions live.  What do you need to do to fulfill them?  And, how that helps others because if done right, you could inspire generations that come after you. Don’t believe me?  Three words: Disney, Ford, Edison.

Succeed or Settle

Welcome back!

I left yesterday with the cliffhanger. You can do anything that you want to; and, to do so you have to do whatever it takes to succeed.

Life is rarely handed to us on a silver platter. What makes our life so precious to us are the things we work and sacrifice for to make our lives better for our families and us. Anything just handed to us no matter how nice, unexpected, or needed, does not hold the same value to us as those things we scrimped, saved, or strived for.

So, the question becomes, who is the future you, and what are you willing to put into making it happen? If you haven’t done so yet, now, before others get up and speak for you, write down what you would want to say about yourself and the things you’ve done during your life and those things you want to do.

I know you feel you are doing a lot of writing this week. It is important. Think about a cartoon of a kid who shoots an arrow into the side of the building, and then runs out and draws the target around where the arrow had landed and thinks he has succeeded. Did he succeed? Or did he settle?

Do you want to succeed? Or do you want to settle? This is a decision you have to make, and I cannot tell you what is right or wrong for you.

 

 

Mountains and Molehills

Hi there!

Did you sit down and consider the questions from yesterday? Did you write something down?

I saw a saying that goes you can be anything you want to be. A Variation on the saying is that you can do anything you want to do. Another variation is you can go wherever you want to go in life.

For some people, those things appear to be just lip service. They point at obstacles, and hindrances, and the results of poor decisions because no one to give them a chance. At the same time, there are people whose mountain of concerns make other people’s look like molehills, and yet they succeed.

Many people look at those who succeed and say, “Sure, but there they are outliers.” My thought on that is, “Yeah, so?”

You can do whatever it is you set your mind to. And, the second part of that? You have to be willing to do what it takes to succeed.

We will talk about what that looks like tomorrow.

A Few Questions To Think On

Last week we covered habits and systems. If you have the right systems inform the right habits to use them life gets a little easier. Without the right systems and the right habits, life gets tougher.

To understand what we need to do and why we must take a step higher, and look around. To help you with this, you need to get your notebook or writing pad, and you need to break down what is most important to you. This list is very important to you. You are making this list to better understand where your work is.

As you start to make your list, I’m learning to ask a few questions just to help you get started and to help you think a little bit about what is most important to you.

Which is most important:

  • Does family come before or after employment?
  • Which comes first, kids or friends?
  • Do you take care of yourself or others first?
  • Is your car a showpiece, or something to get you from point A to point B?
  • Are you happy with the way your house or apartment looks? If not, what steps do you take to change the appearance?
  • Do you ever not go to the doctor because of work needs?
  • How many nights a week do you not get enough sleep? Why?

The next question tells you where you want to end up.

  • If at the end of your life, your friends and family and former coworkers throw you a Three speeches are made about three significant things in your life. What do you want the three items to be? And what would you like the speakers to say?

When you get through thinking about this and writing everything down, a couple of questions are still left:

  • If you make no changes, will the speeches say what you wanted to hear?
  • If not, what would you change so the speeches could be given in a way you would like to hear them?
  • What do you think it would take to make the speeches reality?
  • Are you willing to put in the effort?

These are the questions for you to ponder. Making notes and writing things down is quite often less confusing and ensures that you will probably not forget the subtle things that you should remember along the way.

Looking forward to seeing you again tomorrow, have a great day.

Not Good or Bad

After yesterday’s blog, you’re probably scratching your head and wondering, “What type of systems do I need,” and, “What kind of habits do I need to run them”

The answer is easy and one way or another you’re making and using habits right now, for systems that hopefully work for you. Some people run systems and habits that are bad for them also. Look at a couple of these, and we’re not saying that you have good habits or bad habits, good systems or bad systems. It’s up to you to take a look at what you have to use, and figure out what you need to do. I can help you to look and help you with the how.

Do you have to be at work in the morning? Do you have to do things before you go to work? Showing up at work in pajamas and bed hair does make a statement, probably just not the one you want to make. I bet you use an alarm clock. Making sure the alarm clock is set at night and getting up when it goes off in the morning or good habits. They feed the habit of being ready and going to work on time.

Do others count on you? If you have two children, spouse, maybe a pet needs to be walked, shower to take, need to get dressed. And you need to ensure children are dressed and fed before catching the school bus or walking to school, you truly need some pretty good systems. And, everyone has to have the habits to do what is needed in a timely order.

Do you have habits when you bake a cake? Do you put used items in the sink and throw away discards in the trash as needed? You pile everything up and clean up the kitchen when everything is done or while the cake is baking? Do you leave everything where it is with the idea of you baked the cake, and somebody else can clean the kitchen? They are all habits that feed the system of working in the kitchen.

I didn’t say all habits were good. I only said they are habits. If after work you go with everyone to a local pub, as part of a going away party for a working member, it is a one-time thing. If you go to the pub every day after work, it is a habit. One-time actions and habits in themselves are not good or bad. How you use actions and habits can have a positive or negative effect on you.

One of my habits, which is not good for me, is to recline on the couch nightly and watch other people pretend to do things for entertainment. You got it, I watch far too much TV.

Here’s how you know what you need, what you do, and whether it’s good for you. Make a list of those things you must do. Do you have to cut grass? Do you have to get up in the morning? Are you required to ensure that members of your family make it to where they are supposed to be on time, school, appointments, etc.? Do you have to cook? Do you have to go to the grocery store to get things to cook? Do you have to sleep? Do you have to relax? Do you need to be entertained? These are items we require or are required to do as humans. The way we normally handle what we do soon become habits due to repetition. The overall concept of these things and how we handle them are systems.

Tomorrow, we will look at a couple of systems that many people use. On Friday, we will look at ways to develop systems unique to us that work better than leaving things to chance.

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