Category: Empathy

Helping or Hindering?

Have you ever gone for a walk downtown? We have a great downtown it is alive and vibrant, and it is always changing. People shop and go to the movies and the theater. And there are great and wonderful restaurants. We have churches of just about every faith and denomination, and we usually get along very well. All our churches and many of our citizens work together to develop a safety net for homeless and indigent people.

We offer the indigent free meals, a place to sleep warm on cold nights, close haircuts and many had this back to a regular life. Many of the homeless will enjoy these various offerings, and yet not be interested in finding continuous employment. Many, perform a dangerous task of begging for money at major intersections, and at offramps to major highways. When they let people like me drive, I understand how dangerous, for both the driver and the beggar, such a precarious use of the road begging is.

I understand the desire for the homeless and indigent to do what they can to collect money. And I do feel for the plight of those who are stuck on the street. I was told that the homeless collect about $11 an hour begging at an offramp or a major cross street. I have also been told that those begging can collect $27 an hour.

I believe more protections need to be available to those begging, the drivers, and, the other pedestrians in the area. I am not sure though that this is totally possible. The ACLU protects the rights of the indigent and homeless to beg at the spots they use.

I do like and appreciate the work of the ACLU, and I think if they really want to help the poor and indigent, they should find better ways for these people to earn a living. After all, the ACLU is there to protect everyone, and we are all part of everyone.

The ACLU could work with the City and County, the local workforce center, and various state and federal grants, to find jobs for anyone who does not have a job. Some people can cut grass, and some people can use a leaf blower, or pick up trash. Some people can do assembly work. Some people can do assembly work, or help with recycling efforts.

Granted some people are just lost. They are confused, maybe with medical or physical impairments that make it hard for them to live a regular life. These people are the ones that we should really be taking care of. And, they are usually the ones, which are helped last.

I also understand, that doing one good deed for one person, often launches a bad deed of unintended consequences for another. Not so many decades ago, the legislature and mental health advocates worked together to empty mental health wards and hospitals. They believed, they were doing good for all those poor people who had been locked up for so many years. However, letting everyone go did some good for those who did not belong in mental wards. At the same time, it did horrendous damage to many who needed to be in and have the guidance of those wards and hospitals.

Many now roam the streets, and alleyways, with neither proper medication nor anyone to ensure they take the medication. I honestly believe we are doing a disservice to these people, and we should find better ways to handle the problem.Â

Of course, it all boils down to money. Emptying the mental wards in hospitals saved private insurance companies, and the federal government some big bucks. And they would prefer not to be required to pick up those funding streams again. Although, the costs and burdens now move to emergency services and transportation, city and county police forces and sheriff’s offices, businesses who have losses due to breakage or theft caused by those released from the wards in hospitals. And, private citizens who the mentally ill may attack.

I am earnestly searching for a better way to handle this concern. What we need is a more national discussion on this topic. I ask you to please send this blog to your friends and acquaintances. I also urge everyone to reply to the blog and tell us about any solutions you can think of.

 

 

Planning

Have you ever noticed how frustrating it gets when your plans don’t go the way you expect them to go?  Have you ever gotten frustrated to the point where you cannot figure out how you got to where you are, no idea of how to get back on track, and just want to quit and hide?

Don’t feel bad we all get that way. We look at others on an outing, on a Saturday afternoon, and they look so much in control. We had problems with the store being out of what we wanted to buy, the kids having problems and being fussy in the car, or pets who decide they want to play chase and tag with you and run out the gate just as everybody’s getting into the car.

What do we do about our plans going wrong?  We learn to laugh a little. We understand these things happen. And, not to get upset every time something doesn’t go the way we desire.

Now you’re starting to think, “How did the pros do it?”  As a retired Master Sergeant, I’m here to tell you, there is no corporation better planning than the US military.  And yet, everyone in the US military who has ever been part of building a plan can tell you one thing, plans will generally fall apart with the first enemy contact.

You think I’m kidding you. I assure you I am not. We all develop our plans.  We plan the best we can.  We work with all our prayers, talismans, and other rituals to ensure things go right. And yet, in the end, there is always something that goes awry.

The question becomes, “Why do we do all of the work if we know at some point it will fall apart?”  The answer is simple, knowing that things will generally fall apart, you plan anyway. In that planning, you are continuously looking for the what-ifs, the contingents, the “if this” happens I will “do that.”

I’m not saying that you’re going to get lucky, although sometimes luck is involved. I’m not saying that you will think of absolutely everything. It’s rare. What I’m saying is, the more you plan, and the more you look at the contingencies, the better you will understand.

In understanding, you will see strong spots and weak spots. Having a heads up on strong and weak areas will make your decisions during the execution of the plan much better.  The decisions and changes are now based on what you learned during your preparation. What I’d like to suggest is make the best plans possible.

Every time I plan I know the plan won’t run as predicted. I do not know exactly what will happen to change the plan. I do know what options are available, and I can make much better’s decisions.

Ever planned, and the preparations made changes and decisions easier to make?  If you would like to share something about how planning saved the day when plans went awry, Please, give us a response and tell us what happened.

You Will Realize It When…

We own our fate. All the good and all the bad. Even when we feel not in control, we are responsible for ourselves.  We have family, friends, bosses, co-workers and support staff.  They truly help. No one is an Island. And everyone counts on others in their lives to help them win the day.

Yet in the hand, each of us needs to stand and deliver. The fighter in the ring, the lecturer, the course designer, the salesman, the Bartender, the cook, the secretary, the flight attendant, the doctor, the Explorer, the entrepreneur, and thousands of others, all have support staff either up or down the chain. And, they all have their moments where they put everything on the line.

Should we fear this and try to change it? Do we need to go to two-person integrity? Should we give up and hide? We know all the answers to these are no, of course not.

As much as we enjoy the comradery and support of those around us, those we love, and those we hold dear, what we do when we stand alone actually is a large part of making us who we are.

Be generous and share your wins with all those around you. Even if you’re a pilot that just flew the perfect mission, remember that you would have never gotten the plane off the ground if it wasn’t for some airman ensuring the air in the Planes tires was correct.

How alone are we in the world? Imagine the realization of the fighter pilot who, while walking out to his aircraft, is thrown a set of keys from an airman who says, “Well sir, if you bring her back I’ll fix her up again.”

Yet when standing there alone, you may find that the spirit of everyone who has gone before you, the essence of your coworkers and the love of your family surrounds you in knowledge, comfort, and love.